Have kids, will travel: Northern Michigan

Lots has happened in the last few weeks! We made the 1060 mile move from New Orleans to Metro-Detroit. And in the midst of unpacking and settling my sister offered to take my kids camping. Well...since I don't have anything else to do right now, I wanted in on the fun!

Very yummy blueberry cobbler in a dutch oven

Thankfully she said, "All you need to bring is a sleeping bag," so the kids and I were off! We camped at Interlochen State Park, which I learned is the oldest state park in Michigan. We had a great time boating, fishing and cooking out, but the highlight of the trip for me was heading to Sleeping Bear Dunes, which won Good Morning America's title "The Most Beautiful Place in America" in 2001.


Since we had young children (4 between the ages 2 and 11) we only climbed the first dune at the park. Hiking the entire trail to Lake Michigan is pretty strenuous, so we just sat back and enjoyed to view while the kids went over a few hills thinking they were great adventurers!


There is more to do within the National Park system in the small town of Glen Haven. We visited the US Coast Guard museum which performs a life-saving demonstration every day at 3pm showing how they would rescue survivors of Great Lakes shipwrecks. Also, on Thursdays there is a demonstration of a Lyle gun, the only gun invented by the Army to save lives, and we were there for it! The kids also got to "help" pull it in. We visited the Blacksmith shop and saw a demonstration of techniques.


So happy to be back in Michigan and take advantage of all the natural beauty this state has to offer! As wall as the great State and National Parks!

What I learned in New Orleans

Wow, so many emotions going through me in the past two months. First I had spent a large portion of my time on job hunting, found a job I was excited for only to learn the day before I was supposed to start that my husband was offered a job in Detroit.
I always knew we were moving back, but I did not think it would happen so soon. While the kids and I have spent two years living here, Alex had been here a total of five years. I was excited and I was also nervous because I knew circumstances would leave me with the packing while solo parenting. And not just the household stuff - but Alex would not be coming back for the loading, so this time I would be packing the shed and electronics as well as any other personal things Alex was not able to get to. Don't get me wrong, he worked incredibly hard doing the most that he could before he left, but like most of life, there just wasn't enough time.
I was also surprised that in all these feelings, there was a little sadness too. I've grown a lot in New Orleans, and it was my refuge after an incredibly hard three years when my life forever changed from unexpected single-parenthood and unemployment.
In the midst of all these emotions though, there are some lessons I've learned, or that have deeper meaning to me now that I'd like to share.

Jump into life and forget the waiting place. Sometimes we are caught waiting for things to happen before we move on. Changing your surroundings can also change your perspective. I found myself saying, "What are you waiting for, just do it!" And I'm finding the more "risks" I take when I forget about waiting, the less regrets I have.

Our garden put in by Green Light New Orleans.

Do what you like. I was lucky enough to have a flexible part-time job and I got to explore my interests more. It also helped that my kids are older and we went back to being a two-parent household. I volunteered at my kids' school, I went from making cookies for Prime Time Family Reading Time to being a storyteller (reader), I volunteered at a local farm market, learned how to make more vegetable dishes from local vegetables and started composting and gardening. Again, most of these things I had been "waiting" to do and it was so gratifying to actually be able to do them and explore my interests more.

Politeness is important. Sorry, but this is going to be a little criticism of New Orleans and the South. Maybe I just don't get how to interact with people here, but can't believe how rude people are. I do know incredibly nice people, but some of the interactions I've had, at stores and in public, leave me shaking my head at just the flat-out rudeness of people. Then when I'm back in the Midwest I'm surprised at the politeness - people smiling at you, saying hello, holding the elevator. I'm leaving with a renewed resolve to be politer.

Volunteering at Second Harvest
became a family activity. 

Be there for people. This is my 3rd time moving in 3 years, two of those times cross-country. None of
those times have been paid for by our employer, which leaves me to do the packing and then is still a pretty hefty price tag. I was a single parent for three years (yes, that's what I call it when my husband comes home for a weekend once every six weeks). I've solo parented a month this time. I lost a job I loved after 10 years. I lost a job I was ambivalent toward. In all these times, I've been surprised by the people who have stepped up and helped out, or offered to help. And I've been surprised by those who haven't. I hope this makes me more aware of others. And I'm especially thankful that a byproduct of hardship can be greater empathy for others.

Payoff debt and save money. We've had some curve balls in the last 5 years and one of the things that has helped us to make better decisions is not having debt. It's frustrating that the two houses we've sold in the last two years have just barely covered moving expenses - but those are expenses that have not had to turn into further debt! This time around everything happened on short notice: putting our house up for sale, coming up with a down payment for a rental house, paying for a cross-county move and having a car die and needing a replacement. I am left wishing we had saved more money, but we were able to do fairly well with at least rearranging our finances to make things work. This is a huge reminder for me to prepare for the unexpected with savings.

We became members at the Audubon Zoo
so that we could frequent the exhibits often!

The treasure in your backyard. We got to do a lot in New Orleans. Both tourist things and off the beaten path kind of things. But the thing is - even without living in a touristy city, there are plenty of places "in your backyard" to be explored. Nature, history and culture are everywhere. Sometimes you need to dig a little, but it's always worth it!

Books & Cookies: Part 3

We just finished another Prime Time Family Reading Time at the kiddies school! You all know how much I love this program. This was our 4th session - and I was hired this session to be a "storyteller," which means I got to read the books :)

Of course, after making treats to go with the books the last two session, I suspect there would be mutiny if I did not keep that up!

The first week I made a sugar cookie bar recipe, with the homemade frosting, and decorated it as a quilt map to resemble to quilt in Sweet Clara and the Freedom quilt. I've gotta say that this recipe is my go-to when I need an easy cookie recipe. It's yummy and way less effort than rolling out sugar cookie shapes.

The second week I broke away from the dessert track I've been in and made cream cheese ball bats for Stellaluna. To make mix 1 block cream cheese with 1 cup shredded cheese and 1 chopped green onion. Roll into little balls and then roll the balls in poppy seeds. You can add green olive eyes, but honestly this was a pain the the behind to get the pimentos in, so next time I may just use black olive eyes. Then add purple/black tortilla chip wings.

The third week we read the book Enemy Pie and I made "dirt" cups. Crushed oreos, chocolate pudding, more crushed oreos and a couple of gummy worms.

For Three Cheers for Catherine the Great I made beet cookies since Catherine has borscht at her birthday celebration. Sadly my original beet cookie recipe is no longer available on-line, but this recipe is pretty close to the original.

The Bat Boy and his Violin required some baseball cookies! I used a sugar cookie recipe that came with my cookie cutters and used the frosting from the bar cookie recipe. At least one person told me this was their favorite cookie so far!


















For the last week I made chewy apple cookies to go with Amelia's Road since Amelia's migrant family picks apples throughout the book. Next time I think oatmeal would be a good addition!

This session's theme was Journeys and all the books were great!

Sweet Potato Chili Brownies

I ran across a recipe for Paleo Sweet Potato Brownies on Pintrest that looked yummy! But being Paleo, there were some wacky ingredients that even my local Whole Foods didn't have, so I needed to get creative with substitutions. The result turned out good and my picky eater, who I told the ingredients to, loved the brownies made with avocado and sweet potato!

 INGREDIENTS

Cake
• 1 ripe avocado
• 1 cup sweet potato puree
• ½ cup unsweetened apple sauce
• 4 Medjool dates, pited
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 3 eggs
• 1/3 cup flour
• ½ cup cocoa powder
• 1 tsp chili powder
• ½ tsp salt
• 1 tsp baking soda
• ½ cup pecans, coarsely chopped
Icing
• 4 Medjool dates, pited
• 2 packets (1.15 oz) Justin's chocolate hazelnut butter
• ¼ cup c0coa powder
• 2 tbsp honey
• ½ cup full fat canned coconut milk

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Preheat your oven to 375F. Grease a 9” square baking pan.
2. In the bowl of your food processor or blender, combine avocado, sweet potato puree, unsweetened applesauce, dates and vanilla and process until smooth and creamy. Add cacao powder and again, process until smooth.
3. Add eggs, one at at time, processing until smooth between each addition.
4. In a large mixing bowl, add flour, salt, chili powder, and baking soda and stir until well combined then add the mixture from your food processor and mix until smooth.
5. Add pecans and mix them in.
6. Transfer to your prepared pan. Spread batter evenly and bake for approximately 25 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center of the cake comes out almost clean.
7. Set brownies on a wire rack to cool for 15-20 minutes then transfer to fridge to cool completely, about an hour.
8. Prepare the icing by adding all the ingredients to the bowl of your food processor and process until smooth and creamy.
9. Pour over brownies and spread evenly with a spatula.
10. Place the brownies in the fridge and chill completely. Cut into squares. Store in the fridge

Resolutions

My 2012 New Year's Resolution was pretty epic: to have my family living together by the end of the year (after 2 1/2 years and 1,060 miles apart). Accomplished by July. I was told then that I should always aim high, because if I could pull that off, I could do great things. In 2013 I made the resolution to get one family photo a month. That resolution came after trying to make our Christmas card with sub par photos. That was accomplished and this year the card was much easier!

What about 2014? My main resolution is to find a job that is as awesome as I am. My last job wasn't. I was in a hurry to find a job that would be part time so I could be at home with the kids, but somewhere along the way I came to the conclusion that I had gotten a Masters degree to make copies for people with PhDs. And cruise the internet for 4 hours a day since I could finish my work easily in an hour. Not only do I need more to keep myself stimulated, the world deserves more because I am capable of more. So, now when I look at jobs I remind myself to ask, "Is this an awesome job?" because I don't need to settle. My mini-resolution is not to become dispirited in the search because my last two searches were really depressing. So far I'm doing good and it helps that I have a part-time job subbing and a stipend job with Primetime lined up. Still, if I've learned anything over the last five years, it's that things always work out. Usually not in the way we wanted or planned. BUT sometimes better, sometimes not better and always working out.

January 3, 2014
Celebration In the Oaks
City Park, New Orleans

My second resolution is to keep up with the monthly family pictures!

And my third is to lose a pound a month. With middle-age it seems I have a few pounds that weren't here a few years ago and I'd like my clothes to fit like they used to!

Movie Reviews - Fall 2013

I've watched some unique movies on Netflix lately and some of them were really great so I wanted to share my reviews!

Populaire with Romain Duris and Déborah François. This movie was delightful! Just like a classic from the 1950's (also the time frame it's set in) a young awkward secretary first impresses her boss with her typing skills and then of course they fall in love all while she is training for a world typing competition. If you love the romantic comedies from the 50's & 60's, you'll love this one! Warning: this film is french and does contain subtitles.

Be My Baby with Lacey Chabert, Brody Hutzler, and Julia Duffy. Rylee dupes married men into thinking they had a one night stand, that results in a baby, for the lump sum child support payment. But she meets her match when one of her victims is actually unmarried and wants to keep the fake baby. 

Pretty Ugly People with Missi Pyle, Melissa McCarthy, and Josh Hopkins. What happens with you meet up with your college friends a decade later for an unplanned hiking trip? Some people have changed, some people think they have changed and some still want to change. I liked that this movie could delve into the decisions we make, and some that others make for us, and still be a comedy with a serious side.

Sassy Pants with Anna Gunn, Ashley Rickards, and Haley Joel Osment. While this movie was awkward, both in acting and in premise, I had to cheer as Bethany figured out adulthood for herself. After living with an over-protective mother who home-schooled her through graduation, she is not satisfied with also home-schooling her way through college. She longs for relationships and to have a career of her own choosing. When she goes to live with her dad and his lover, she finds that relationships are complicated and the only person she has to count on is herself until her mom finally steps up and does what is right for her daughter and not herself.

The Hot Flashes with Brooke Shields, Daryl Hannah, Virginia Madsen, Camryn Manheim, Wanda Sykes, and Eric Roberts. What happens when former high school basketball champs, now middle aged women, form a team that challenges the current all-star high school girls basketball team in an attempt to raise money for breast cancer prevention? Oh so many laughs! At the same time they are overcoming old rivalries and forming new bonds because they realize the power of support.

The Lake Effect with Kay Panabaker, Tara Summers and Ross Partridge. This movie had me at the "Welcome to Michigan" sign in the first 5 minutes! Filmed and set in Grand Haven, this movie takes places at the family beach house when Celia shows up on her father's doorstep 9 months pregnant at age 18. She challenges the relationship they've had and the one they will continue to have once the baby is born.

Union Square with Mira Sorvino and Tammy Blanchard. This movie is not for the faint of heart. It's a very deep look into the lives of two sisters who had a troubled childhood. One sought to escape this by avoiding her family while the other was drawn into the chaos and lives that out in her personal life. While you are never quite sure who's recollection is correct, this movie does have resolution in the end as the sisters come to terms with their past and how it has defined their present.

The Lifeguard with Kristen Bell, Mamie Gummer and Martin Starr. I don't recommend this movie at all. I was so disappointed. I love Kristen Bell as an actress, but this movie had a spoiled end-of-20's woman who decided life wasn't what she thought it was, so she moved back in with her parents and takes up her high school job lifeguarding at a pool and ends up in an affair with an under-age boy. I think this movie was disrespectful to all the wonderful people I know in the 20's trying to make life work without having a "crisis" that is made-up. And the under-age affair? If it was the other way around "pedophile" would be yelled. Her friends also have similar "crisis-es" that are also stupid. People figure things out in real life without having sex with minors and doing drug/drinking alcohol with them.

I Am A Woman

So, here are the two Facebook posts that start off this blog entry:

"Mom, there have been no women presidents."
"Why do you think that is?"
"Men are for menkind, girls are all Barbies and Hello Kitty."
Oh my...where to even begin.
(Btw, this coversation was with my 7 year old while my 10 year old was yelling at him not to go down that path).

And

Okay, so this is the theme of my day:
As I was on the exercise bike I saw a high schooler tweet about an ideal wedding dress, and I couldn't help thinking what a downer Pintrest, etc, was because I did not plan my wedding until I was actually engaged.
Then at work I read a report on the status of women in Louisiana and page 38 is how many thousands of dollars less women make than men in the same industries.
Then I am asked if my husband and sons want to go to a hockey game. WHAT ABOUT ME? I like hockey more than my kids do.
Then, the whole women president conversation.
I'm feeling bummed, because you know what - women can't have it all, but the worst part is the assumptions everyone makes about you.

First I want to say that I did not intend to be antagonistic. I realize now that my post may have offended the offerers of the hockey tickets. I assumed there were only 3 tickets available and that's why the offer was first made to the males of my house. This was not a criticism of you, but rather an observation that my whole day had had a gender slant on how I viewed things. 

But just as I made assumptions, others make assumptions too and when they are made along the lines on gender, they cannot always be applied to individuals. I prefer hockey over pedicures and whiskey over wine. Yes, you can probably make the argument that women on the whole prefer the opposite of me. And the problem doesn't occur on the hockey or pedicure level, but it does occur when someone assumes that a woman in her 20's would not be a good hire because she will probably want maternity leave. It occurs when we don't consider a woman running for office and there is no one to encourage her in the first place. 

I feel like I've been witnessing a silent backlash to women lately. I think it's being perpetuated covertly by media sources, but to a point where we're not really aware that it's happening. Take Pintrest for example. I love Pintrest, I love finding new recipes for all the local veggies we've been eating lately. But what I don't like is when younger women (high school and college age) have boards devoted to the perfect body. While men feel that pressure too, it is much more emphasized to women. The "wedding" boards of the unengaged bug me too. Now, I know it's nothing new for women to have a fantasy wedding planned out , but it's much more thought consuming when when you have the virtual tools laid out for you. While I spent a lot of time in high school and college thinking about guys, I spent more time thinking about my college and career choices. I worry that those are being downplayed to the younger generations. While I love "teen dramas" like Gossip Girl, I look at those shows as satire and I worry that those newer to this world will look at them as a guidebook. 

And the reality of women in politics? In the 2010 elections (from Women in politics stats)
For the first time since 1987, the United States made no progress in electing more women to Congress.
Women are still under-represented at all levels of government.

• Women hold only 17% of the seats in Congress. (Source)
• Only 22% of all statewide elective executive office positions are currently held by women. (Source)
• State Legislatures are only 24% women. (Source)
• Only 6 out of 50 states have a female governor. (Source)
• The United States trails behind much of the world—ranking 90th in the number of women in our national legislature. (*Note: The U.S. is listed as 73rd, but after accounting for tied rankings of other countries, the ranking for the U.S. is 90th. Source)
• On average, male cabinet appointees outnumber women cabinet appointees in our states by a ratio of 2 to 1.  (Source)
• 50% less women than men consider of running for office. Of those, 30% less actually run, with only a fraction seeking higher office. (Lawless, Jennifer and Richard L Fox. It Takes a Candidate: Why Women Don’t Run for Office. New York: Cambridge UP, 2005.)
• Women constituted 54% of voters in the 2008 elections, but only 24% of state legislators. (Source)
• Women of color represent only 4% of Congress and 23% of women Members of Congress. (Source)

I am not saying that everyone is against women. What I am saying is that assumptions we all make affect so many different levels of our lives. I think we constantly need to be in dialog about the assumptions we make about women, race, economics and every level where there is disparity. I think we all need to advocate for choices for everyone. I read an article this morning on computer coding for girls that made the point that most schools do not even offer this to any students. I would love to see more programs for all students while encouraging those (girls or other minorities) to go into underrepresented areas. I am very vigilant, as the only woman in my house, as to what views my kids are acquiring outside the house as to what girls and women are. I have nothing against Barbie and Hello Kitty, but I have yet to make the connection with my 7 year old about what that has to do with being president? I think we all need to be alert as to the messages we are sending and receiving.  

Most of all, I think we need to get to know people as individuals. I really believe that when we learn more about each other and truly care about each other - change happens. For us and for others. Its our connectedness that makes us strong.